Flash Fiction: The 1 900 Number

Writing Progress Update
Oops, another unexpected hiatus.
Nope, didn’t die, close, I came down with a nasty dose of the flu. Can’t really complain, it has been a good four years since I have had something that wiped me out. Unfortunately, it stuffed up the writing routine I was in the process of developing. Ever noticed how easy it is to stop productivity and so hard to battle procrastination? On the bright side, I’ve been working on one of my epic projects and have reached a stage where I could probably write the first book. Insert a happy dance here. Shamefully the blog was sacrificed as I believe in following my muse, she sulks if she doesn’t get her way and makes me pay in dreadful ways.

Flash Fiction Prompt

Use the following items;
Mobile phone

The 1 900 Number


The dirty old man rang a 1 900 number on his mobile phone.
        “What are you wearing?” asked the voice of a vixen.
        Unknown to the pervert, his sex kitten really was a frumpy middle aged woman in need of a wax job, doing her ironing with an fag hanging out of her mouth.
        “Stockings,” he replied.
        The woman doing her job for a quick buck, stopped herself from telling her “client” to go wrap those stockings around his neck after enclosing a brick inside. However she did her job like a pro and was accustomed to fetishes.
        “Unbutton your shirt,” she ordered, while she ironed the collar of her husband’s shirt. 
The man took off his shirt, of course, and did whatever was asked of him. At the climax of the session he heard siren through the phone.
        “Sorry sugar my apartment block is having a fire drill, got to dash”.

4 thoughts on “Flash Fiction: The 1 900 Number

  1. And then he discovered his phone bill came to $1900 after that call too 🙂 I’m curious were the stockings fishnets?

    1. oracleopus says:

      Hmmm if they could hold a brick lol

  2. Lisa says:

    You have an amazing imagination! The woman in particular comes to life for me. A salt of the earth, seen it all before type, she strikes me. She seems like the sort of person who’d get involved in complicated things and rescue everyone, probably against her better inclinations, but knowing they’d need a bit of a helping hand to unstick themselves. 🙂

    1. oracleopus says:

      I think I imagined a bit of scrubber who does what she has to for a buck.

      Maybe she should make a return sometime?

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