Hera, Athena, and Aphrodite met up for brunch. The goddesses reminisced over the good old days when the gods reined supreme. A time before their roles were rendered to archetypes in storybooks.
“I don’t know why we let Paris decide our worth.”
“Like that mortal knew true beauty.”
“You two were such sore losers,” said Aphrodite, flicking her blonde curls.
“Why don’t we ask him?” Athena caught the waiter’s attention. “Excuse me sir, who’s your favourite goddess?”
The young man shrugged. “Caffeina.”
Egos fell to Hades; upstaged by a younger 21st-century goddess.
Caffeina — goddess of energy, stamina, and determination.
This story is a sequel to Greek mythological tale The Judgement of Paris, aka the catalyst for the Trojan War.
The Judgement of Paris Recap According to The Muse
Once upon a time,
Greek goddesses Hera, Athena, and Aphrodite were contestants in the very first beauty pageant. Even horn bag Zeus knew that judging such a contest would see his nuts cut off, and bowed out. Prince Paris of Troy was given the honour of judging the contest. Each goddess turned to bribery. Athena offered undefeatable battle skills, Hera, all of Europe, and Aphrodite, the most beautiful woman in the cosmos. Nevermind the woman happened to be Helen — a married queen.
Ancient men, just like today’s, had a weakness between the legs, so of course, Paris chose Helen as his reward. In true Greek style, everything turned to shiz. Hello, Trojan War.
And no human lived happily ever after.